Continental #5/ Baltic boogaloo, Prelude

Tallinn, Estonia. And yes, this is the Baltic Sea. 

I'm fresh off the plane and I have a diaryful and a mindful - and a heartful, too - of thoughts and emotions and feelings. And yet this time I am neither melancholy, nor am I clear conscienced.

Fresh off the boat, but off the boat nonetheless, and I can now say with all certainty that, looking back, this was my best trip out of all of them. I am two years older than I was last time and certainly feel older too (and in a bad way), and yet it was a much better experience overall. I met more people, and I met a much higher percentage of people I clicked with. And yet I think I've become less pleasant in the past two years that have elapsed. I certainly wasn't on my best behavior this time. What was it I said to someone - I'm usually a very nice person when I'm sober, I said, but after mulling it over a bit, I realised that in some cases I'm still not a particularly pleasant person even when I am sober. It depends on the person in question and my mood that day. So many people have told me what a nice person I am and how easy it is to talk to me, and my response is always that I'm nice to nice people. That's a direct quote from Jason, but it's oh so true. I'm sure - in fact I am positive - that a lot of people thought I was an absolute and utter tit. I'm not sorry about that, because a) I am generally unpleasant to idiotic people because ain't no one got time for that, and b) I'm not a hippie and it is not free love for all.

This trip also went much more smoothly than continental #4. I seem to remember a lot of stupidly early or late buses and trains, and lots of rushing around. None of that happened this time - well, I did have two early buses to catch, one in Brno and one in Krakow - but that was it. Everything else went perfectly, and again - to paraphrase Kurt Vonnegut - everything was beautiful and nothing hurt. I think I've reached that stage in life where I've really stopped giving very many f*cks because life is - I won't say too short, but it is not meant to be wasted on superfluity. I also let myself go rather during this trip - and that's a good thing, because I've filtered out all the bad and all that's left is the wonderful.

I don't know when I can write full updates, and this will probably have to do for the time being. I'm going to be very busy within the next few days and weeks or so. The beginning of a beginning and the end of an end. Watching Kingsman on my flight back - my direct flight. I love direct flights. I cried with laughter when watching that, there was a lot of hilarious English swearing involved. Funniest movie I've watched in a while. I'll probably try to watch it again when I have time and energy to waste.

Isms? Home is where the heart is. Europe, always Europe, the old world. My love affair with you continues - or rather, it never ended. I'm not sure where my heart is and that's why I travel - because I want to find my heart. And most of all, finding the perfect balance between hope and despair - those are the moments I live for.

Wien flughafen. That feeling when you realise that you don't need a visa to go to any of the cities on the flights departure board.